Not much longer now. Day 20: Views on drugs and alcohol.
I’m very much in the mindset of you can do what you want as long as it doesn’t affect me.
I was very much a goody two shoes. I didn’t really drink until I was 18. It didn’t help that I look much younger than I actually am, so if I did try and go out and drink, I wouldn’t get far.
When I did start to drink however, I was really bad. I didn’t do it often, but when I did I went hard. I didn’t seem to be able to stop once I had started. I thought, if I’m spending all this money to drink, I may as well get drunk. I hated this. I was always sick, without fail. I was like this until I was 21? So just last year I properly stopped, I only drank for 3 years. I can remember going on a night out with work and having 10 double vodkas within 2 hours. I can remember having them, crying, being sick and getting picked up. I do not remember anything after I got in the car until I woke up. This scared me. Did I say anything to my friends? Did I say anything to my family?
After that I only had one bad night of drinking, at a BBQ with work. Same as before, I drank too much, was sick. Probably embarrassed myself. Since then, I have not drank. I don’t really like the taste of it, I don’t like how I am with it, and I see it as a waste of money.
I’m not the biggest fan of being around drunk people either. I’d hate to know what people thought of me when I was drinking, because I’d rather not be around anyone who is drunk. I remember when I was little, maybe 11, someone I know was drunk and got really in my face and it scared me. I always picture it when I’m near someone who is drunk. Maybe that is why I always drank so much when I went out. If I’m one of the drunk people, it won’t bother me that everyone else is drunk. Now I just try to avoid situations like that.
As for drugs, I haven’t personally done anything like that. I tried to smoke weed once but I hated the feel and taste of it and will definitely not be doing it again.
With both of these though, drugs and alcohol, I really don’t care what people do. I have friends who have done drugs, I have friends who drink all the times, I have friends who don’t drink at all and have never touched drugs.
Do whatever makes you happy.